Thursday, October 6, 2016

At least....for a little while.

  I'm sitting in my living room tonight just feeling so thankful for my children. This isn't going to be a post about how being a mom is just so great, because butterflies and unicorns and fairytale feelings happen all the time. No. This is a post about how the internet and all of its news articles makes me so glad that I have my children and that they are in good health and that they are safe.
  This world is a cruel place that doesn't give a fuck about you or your kids. There are murderers and child rapists and people that will kidnap your kids to sell them. There are wars being fought and bombs going off. There are storms that rip through towns and whole countries, eradicating them completely. There are people that will brainwash you and your children into believing that there are people out there that are lesser beings than you so that you too are filled with hate. There are mothers...and fathers....that brutally abuse and take the lives of their own children.
  My children know nothing of this. My children may have heard and seen a fight once or twice in their lives, but they know nothing of the fighting and the pain that goes on in this world. I am so very thankful that I was the one to be blessed with them. I am so thankful they didn't end up with someone else as their parent or some other place as their home. I wish....I wish...that I could scoop up all of the world's children into my arms and love them like I love my own children, but my arms are not big enough. I get angry at this world. I get angry sometimes at God/Goddess/Spirit/Creator/Whatever the hell you want to call him/her/them/it. I get mad, because I want all of this brutal nonsense to end. I don't understand any of it. My brain cannot conceive of the reasons why this has to happen. No answer from anyone has ever made it okay in my eyes. The answers that piss me off are the ones like, "It's all a part of God's perfect plan" and "God is in control". Well, excuse the hell out of me for not wanting to worship a God that would use the brutal rape and murder of a 9 month old baby in his divine plan!
  See, I do not believe that my God and Goddess have their hands in any of this. I do not believe that if we call to them, they save us. I believe they have left that shit up to us. I think we were created to make the right and good choices, but that God and Goddess washed their hands of being a direct part of controlling things when they made us. Maybe there are angels or spirits out there that help create miracles, but God and Goddess? Nah. They are our source of strength. They are what we are to strive to be like. Pure love. It's up to us to decide which path we are going to take. Will it be the path of hatred and evil or will it be a path of love and acceptance?
  I have chosen the path of love. And while I may have a little temper about me, and while I may say 'fuck' way too often, and while I may have issues with friendships, because I don't genuinely like many people, I have chosen to have love in my heart. Even if you screw me over I will still make you a plate of food if you haven't eaten all day.
  This is why I'm thankful for my children. I'm thankful they are with me so I can love them and protect them from this world, at least for a little while. At least...for a little while.

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